of two minds...

I love Jesus. My vision for life is "dangerously, obsessively Jesus" ("The Vision" Pete Greig). I love that he loves the wrong people, builds his church on the unqualified, tweaks religious leaders, heals, saves, affirms, listens, teaches, challenges and dispenses grace and judgement. I love that He is God in the flesh, yet defers to His Father. I love that He is God in the flesh, yet points the way to the Spirit. I love that He makes a way for us to be reconciled the Father and have the indwelling of the Spirit AND promises to be with His people until the end of the age. He makes a path for an intimate and reconciled relationship with the Triune God.

I love that He incarnated, observed, was tempted, healed, taught, died, raised from dead and ascended to the Father. I love the He is coming again to set everything right and redeem the world that was created through Him. I love that He never gives up.

I love this world. I love spring days. I love the comrade of a good frisbee game, an adventure or of a campus outreach. I love my friends, Christian and non-Christian alike. I love the way the flowers bloom in my backyard, even though I do nothing for them. I love my wife and my family. I love my cat, the Mariners, Seahawks and even that team in OKC.

I love the people who are angry with religion. I love my gay friends, my mormon friends and single parent friends. I love the agnostic professors I've met.

I love hard work. I love taking on a task that is too big for me to handle. I love reading challenging books, the bible and others. I love conservative pastors, like Joe from PBF and liberal pastors I won't name, because they don't like the label "liberal".

I love church. I hate church.

I love being with homeless people. Homeless people scare me.

I love prayer. I hate saying the same thing over and over.

I love to worship God and feel most alive when I do so. I hate simplistic songs that are more about me than God.

I want to be orthodox. I want to be unique.

I believe in unearned, undeserved grace. I believe my life is never good enough.

I believe my Father (both of them) loves me. I believe that I am a disappointment.

I believe God never gives up on you. I often think that God has given up on me.

I don't know if I believe in the Rapture. I believe every word of Revelation is true.

I believe in a new heaven and a new earth and that it is important that we start the bible at the beginning and end it at the end.

I believe in hell. I don't know who goes there, if we choose to be there or if God puts us there.

I believe in spiritual battles. I don't always now which side my beliefs are on.

I believe everyone I know would love Jesus if they met him. I'm not sure how to arrange the introduction.

I think I lose track of what's important much of the time. I think that God is good about reminding me.

I love Jesus. I love that I don't have a handle on Him. I miss Him when I wander. I want be with Him and I want to be here. I want Him here. I want to introduce my friends to Him. I want to eat with Him. I want Him to continue to blow my mind and my expectations.

I love the Spirit. I want the Spirit to lead me to hard truths. To convict me and affirm me. I want see the Spirit move with power and intimacy. I want the Spirit to teach me to pray...even if that means I need to re-learn honesty.

I love the Father. I love that He sent His Son instead of taking Abraham's. I love that He waits for the lost son (or daughter) and runs out to greet them...no questions asked.