Something to Ponder

I arrived to discover a mini-revival among all of the local Goths, punks, tree-hugging, tie-dyed crusties, and dreadlocked "alternatives" in town. Guys with chains from their ears to their noses, girls with mohawks, pretty much anyone with a weird haircut in town had recently become a Christian or firmly rejected Christ (italics added). There was manic worship led by a guy with "Sex Pistols" written on is bass guitar. There was deliverance, drugs, Satanists getting saved, spectacular backsliding, eating disorders, self abuse, and yes, there was evidently drug overdoses too.

-Chapter 2, Red Moon Rising

Rocked by Evil

I am shaken as I write this. Like most students, I feel as though I am remarkably able to detach myself from reality, to be able to separate my head from my heart when the situation calls for it.

Today I utterly failed at that task.

The book Red Moon Rising on one level a book about the power of prayer. On another level, it is about the power of death. The first chapter plunged me deep into the world of teen and young adult suicide. My hands were shaking as I read about Kurt Cobain's suicide note expressing that he felt "guilty beyond all words". I was fighting back tears when I read about a teenager named Markus being found by his parents, dead, with only the Beatles song "Let it Be" playing on repeat serving as any explanation.

What the hell did Kurt Cobain have to feel so guilty for? How can Markus expect others to simply let it be? How long are we going to let it be?

I am 24 years old. I realize that most of you reading this are about my age. I am not okay with the fact that if someone I know who is my age dies, their is a better chance that they killed themselves than by any other cause. I am not okay that suicide is worse among us in the western world than any where else. I am not okay with the fact that with all the money, entertainment and time that we have, we still struggle to find a reason to carry on.

And I am not okay that I don't have any answers.

Recently I read an X-Men comic, which should be no surprise to anyone. In the comic, a teenage boy named Wing had recently been "cured" of his mutation that allowed him to fly. Wing was struggling mightily with who he was if he wasn't able to fly. What was his identity? His purpose? He felt like little more than an anonymous face. Wing walked to a high cliff on Professor Xavier's property. He was with a friend. He asked his friend what she would do if she lost her powers. She coldly answered, "I would jump". Wing took her advice. Later in the comic it was revealed that he was not on that cliff at all. It wasn't real. His friend wasn't real. It was all created by a holographic chamber called the "Danger Room". All that was actually real was his feelings of anonymity and his body laying dead on the ground.

Who is telling us to jump?

Less than a minute after reading this section on suicide, the radio at the coffee shop I was at began to play the song "Let it Be". The song awoke me from my thoughts. I felt like all of my questions, my anger and my sadness had been heard. Some will call this a coincidence, but not me. I feel like God encouraged me to keep asking these questions, to keep caring. I truly believe that this evil is not unconquerable. I still have questions, anger and sadness, but I was also reminded that I have hope. I have a reason to pray.

A Trip to Middle Earth

Confession time, I am NOT very knowledgeable about the Lord of the Rings. I like the movies. I liked the books, but I only read them once and honestly, it took me about three months and I probably won't make the commitment again. I don't speak Elvish, have no idea how the whole heritage of Aarogon works, or how he can be the king that returns so mightily. Put me in a room with ten random people, I may know more about Middle Earth lore than nine of them. Put me in a room with LotR fans, I will be sent away with a Hobbit-sized imprint on tushy (Hobbits have big feet they tell me...). I do, however, believe that J.R.R Tolkien was an absolute genius. He really did craft a tale that is one of the best ever written and created two absolutely compelling villains, Sauron (the big fiery eye) and the seemingly innocent, and I should add, inanimate ring. These two wildly ambitious and compelling pictures of evil strike a chord that few villains can match and do an amazing job of explaining a hard to explain world view.

If someone can email my high school English teacher that thesis, I would really appreciate it.

First the eye, that was once a man who created a bunch of rings. When old J.R.R. first told his friends that his main villain was never going to utter a line, combat with any hero or even directly impact the area around him, I imagine that his friends responded with the kind of enthusiasm that I reserve Creed music (read: none). That just isn't the way that villains work! They give away their plans and cackle. They utter cheesy lines that are repeated by college students for years. They do...something. Tolkien's villain looks at things. And looks some more. Even with all of the effort put into keeping the ring from him, we are never given any real insight into what exactly would happen if he got his ring back. Would he gain a body again? Would his big eye get bigger? We simply do not know. So what is exactly so special about Sauron? It's that he is a corrupter. He is a liar. He is an intimidator. Without a word, or awesome armor, he can control thousands and scare a thousand more. I have to admit, it's kind of cool. Saruman looks into his seeing ball (wow, I am so bad at Tolkien terminology) and sees Sauron, in all of his power and this wise and powerful wizard changes sides. Pippin looks into the same ball and the poor Hobbit can't speak for awhile. These kings come under his spell and who knows how many years later, after Sauron's evil has consumed their bodies and souls, they are still following his bidding. All of his followers are best remembered for who they were before coming into contact with him. The orcs were once elves, the ringwraiths were the kings of old, Saruman was the wisest wizard. Look at what happened to the kings of Gondor and Rohan! One goes insane by looking in the crystal ball, the other seemingly becomes possessed by Saruman working with Sauron! Sauron corrupts whatever he touches. Such is his way. He is not just evil though, he is patient. He comes back into the scene only after he is forgotten. When he is no longer part of the world dialogue, when legends of his first defeat are no longer told, he emerges. It is so important to remember though, he waited until he was invisible. Basically I like Sauron (as a character) because he is give me the willies evil.

The ring is an equally hard to fathom villain, but it is a villain nonetheless. The ring's purpose is not unlike Sauron, it corrupts those who encounter it (see the haunting Gollum), what is unique to the ring though, is that it holds the power to make those who encounter it believe that they can control it. Isildor doesn't destroy it when he has the opportunity to do so, Boromir dreams of using it to save his people, Frodo proves to me not as incorruptible as he first appears, Gollum finally is destroyed trying to maintain control over it. It finds the evil that lurks in the heart of all those who hold it (or even come near it). It seeks out vanity, greed, shame, fear and it uses those emotions. It destroys trust and intimacy. It consumes good intentions. It Sauron in disguise. Ultimately it sounds like a fruit I have read about and a promise that one bite would make you like God. Adam and Eve's apple, hanging from the neck of a Hobbit, tempting all to take it. Daring them, prodding them, assuring them that they can really handle them. Ring of power indeed.

The portrayal of evil in the Lord of the Rings is a huge and slippery thing to detect and to explain. Is external? There is Sauron, he is lying and intimidating. He wields a giant army, one that brings fear to all who lay eyes on it. He is the risk to the world after all. But couldn't it be internal? Aarogorn can't touch the ring, because he is only human. He is knows that his imperfection is breeding ground for that ring and its power. Boromir struggles with insecurity and anger before he sees any ring. The elves bemoan the greed of man, they do not trust the more internal evil in man's heart. Tolkien refuses to place his hand in either the internal or external camp. Middle Earth does indeed have an ultimate evil, but others can't use that as cop out for thier own faults. Conversely, evil is more than a character flaw, it is an external threat and it wants to consume the whole world. I am stuck, as a Christian, this is what I was always taught (of course I was also taught the LotR was evil because it had wizards, but that is neither hear nor there). I was always told that evil was out there and in my own heart. I don't hear that much these days. I hear that evil is out to get us, in the forms of other people usually. Or, I am told that I am greedy and bad, but fix-able. If I focus, or try real hard, maybe I can be okay. Tolkien buys into neither. He saw evil in his world and his own heart and that emerges in his book. I say "bravo". I think we need to remember this.

After all, I read this book once about people who forgot about evil. I think it might of had a ring in it...

Mystique

Villains, villains, villains. It almost makes me feel dirty to write about villains all of the time. I remember reading that C.S. Lewis had a difficult time writing Screwtape Letters because he had to think like a demon all of the time. I am not sure I have had the same problem. I write about villains and I simply keep realizing that evil is worse than I ever imagined it, but also more familiar. With that though, I am going to press on with Mystique, who I have been very excited to write about. Hope that this is much fun as I hoped it would be.

Mystique never goes away. In comics, she might fade from the forefront for awhile, but she works her way back into the story at the most unexpected times. In the movies she and Magneto represented the only follow up villains and guess what? She's back for round three this summer. The woman is fascinating. For those who have managed to miss seeing her, she is a very blue woman, who can look like whoever she wants to. She usually sticks with other petite women, because it is easy for her maintain a shape like her own and because her second most potent weapon is that she is a woman, a weapon she wields well. She is also very mysterious. What's her real name? She goes by Raven Darkholme, but that is generally excepted as an alias. How old is she? Old enough to be Nightcrawler's natural mother and foster mother to Rogue. Where has she been in the past? Who has she been? How many lives has she led? Whose life is she living right now? If Magneto is the most morally consistent character in the Marvel universe, Mystique's is the hardest to come to grips with. Who is she?

She doesn't know.

Really. She doesn't anymore. She has lived to many lives, wore to many masks. She has been to fluid to have any "character" anymore. She no longer is who she once was, she is now simply her characteristics. She is manipulative. She is cunning. She is very sexual. But she isn't a real person anymore. She is never successful at settling her life down, because she always tries it as another person. The fraud is always discovered. Whoever she once was has been lost forever, whoever she is now is always is flux. To Magneto she is one person. Another to Rogue. Another to the next man who decides to settle down with one of her characters.

Mystique's evil is one of the most tragic that I have ever encountered in any fiction. She is evil because she has been willing to kill off all of herself in order to gain acceptance. She becomes who men most desire, but how can the question of whether any man could ever desire her go away? She becomes what her business associates need, but how can she shake the question of whether they ever needed her? She has never been able to be a wife or a mother for any length of time, because eventually people needed a real person, not a forever changing figment of their imagination. Sure she is dangerous. She may kill you in your sleep, kidnap your daughter or assassinate a world leader, but I cannot help but wonder who is really committing those crimes anymore?

If we're not careful, we all run the risk of becoming Mystique. While most of us lack the ability to literally change our skin, most of us are perfectly able to become someone else when we sense someone else wants us to be so. I have played so many characters in my life. I have been the perfect son, boyfriend, friend, employee all because something inside of me has sworn up and down that no one wants anyone like me. I have needed just a few simple alterations to become what people have wanted me to be. What happens after a year of that? Five? Ten? Fifty? You become Mystique, simply a conglomeration of someone else's desires.

Evil cannot create. It simply cannot. It can only corrupt. Slowly, it twists, distorts, steals and lies to leave a mangled thing left. A thing that once was a person. A friend or child that has lost everything that once made it real. When I first became a Christian I tried to make my faith just another identity, one that I could put on my shelf next to the student, the drunk and the ladies man. Jesus wasn't satisfied to gain only one of my persona's. He instead wanted me. He wanted me to become who I was created to be. It is not always fun. "You've changed", "You're a sell out", these phrases have actually been said to me (I just thought they were used in bad teen movies). Some of these have been said by some of my best friends. So of those friends have left my life now, never to return. Others left and now are back and our friendships actually mean something now. All I can say at this point though, this is way better. Way better. It's not over though. The trip from phony to authentic is slow and sometimes painful. Yet something amazing happens along the way, the pervasive fears start to have less of a hold. The fear of being alone becomes weaker. The fear of being discovered no longer grabs my throat it was the Reaper. It's simply a better way to live.

A Short Note on MLK

Martin Luther King. Jr is simply one of the most complete and remarkable American's ever. This country, like so many others, has so much to live down, a history of racism being at the top of that list. From slavery, to Jim Crowe, to "Separate but Equal", to racial profiling and today's ethnically divided slums. We need this holiday and we need to keep dreaming. We also need to keep acting on this dream, to keep living it. If we stop challenging racist institutions and only pat ourselves on our backs for what has been accomplished, then it is time to stop celebrating. Finally, as we celebrate this day, we cannot forget that MLK's conviction not only came from his life, but also from his faith. Let's have the guts to ask God for the eyes he gave King. That is a risky prayer that just might lead to a world that looks more like a fulfilled dream.

Cool New Band

My friend Jacob is in a band named Ether Hour. They are way cool and I have been listening to the music pretty much non-stop since he told me about it. So click on the link below and give them a listen, you'll be glad that you did.

www.etherhour.com

Subscribe to Gen 26

The above link will give you the option to subscribe to my blog. I have not been able to get it to work with email yet, but you should be able to set it up to work on quite a few different homepage options. Give it a shot if you so desire.

Race Dynamics in Sports

Watch Hoop Dreams.

Read this article http://sports.espn.go.com/espn/page2/story?page=klosterman/060111

Thank God that at least some people are willing to talk about race. It is sad that normally when race is brought up, we immediately slip into PC shells, never acknowledging that we have stereotypes and misconceptions, thus never getting to a point where we can attempt to address and get over them. We don't learn, because we are trained to never say anything. Under the shield of sports, here are two relevant entries into a real discussion about race.

Amen.

(I'll be back to bad guys soon, I promise.)

Magneto

"...Every heel [bad guy] needs to believe he is justified in his actions, no matter how wrong the logic behind those actions may be." - Mick Foley, page 222, Foley is Good.

Yes, that is a quote from a professional wrestler autobiography being used to introduce a post about a comic book character. I am dork. But if you have been reading this blog for more than a week, you know this already. This quote is necessary in order to understand Magneto, and I think even to understand some ugly parts of ourselves.

First though, I need to address those of you who have no idea who I am talking about. Magneto is the arch-nemesis/occasional partner of the X-Men. On the surface he is just old guy, who feels comfortable wearing purple and can bend some metal. In reality (or the comic book version of reality) he is one of the most powerful people in the Marvel universe, has a loyal following of powerful friends and he views himself of some sort of messiah to mutants. He is an old man in a young man's body (don't ask), in fact he is old enough to have been a child in Auschwitz, a Nazi concentration camp. Which would mean that the "master of magnetism" is a Jewish-Mutant, a member of two minority groups with histories of persecution. His parents were killed in Auschwitz, his wife left him when she learned of his powers. He is a close friend of Professer Xavier, though is the ideological Malcolm X to Xavier's Martin Luther King Jr. Magneto is a world criminal (terrorist?) who has on more than one occasion actually saved the world. His philosophy is not complex; humans need to get out of the way, it is time for mutants to rule the world.

So what can be made of a character who has endured, but also has caused so much pain? It is impossible not to sympathize with the pain that the man has endured, to be imprisoned and rejected for not what you have done, but instead for who you are would and has caused many good people to give up trying to act justly and instead act with one's own interests in mind. Yet Magneto has hardly become selfish, instead he has become fanatical for his people, the mutants. His desire has become to create a world where his pain will no longer become the norm. He is the product of the evil of man. Of the hatred of man. Of the brokenness of man.

Unfortunately, he is not simply worthy of our sympathy, but if we are to put ourselves into the shoes of the people who occupy the Marvel universe, he is also the object of our fear. He is a weapon of mass destruction. A weapon with every reason to not believe that peace is possible. What evidence has he ever seen of different people working together? Living together? He knows no peace, yet his power will always be there to tempt him into believing that he can make peace.

Magneto is sympathetic and dangerous, but he is also and equally so, compassionate. He cannot stomach the pain of mutants. He has witnessed to many mutant genocides than he can bear. He has seen the world of man go back and forth, from seeking peace to mutant eradication. He has seen death and broken promises. Many times he has retired to a new country or a new space station, only to be brought back into the fight, not by his own desire for power, but instead by suffering mutants, begging him to return, to save them. How can his conscious allow him to do nothing?

The final characteristic of Magneto that cannot be ignored is his moral consistency, he is the most morally consistent character I have ever encountered in comic books. While other characters violate the ethics that guide them constantly, Magneto remains steadfast. He is for mutantkind, by any means necessary. While the human governments go back and forth and the X-Men follow the whims of those governments, Magneto stays the course, steady and straight. As a result, he can be an ally or foe to the X-Men or to any other character, depending on the situations that surround him. It also should be noted here that X-Men comics have explored parallel universes and alternative futures often, Magneto is rarely a villain in any of these universes. In these universe's bigotry and hatred has won, humans have sought the death of all mutants and Magneto has never backed down, he has stood strong by his persecuted people. He has been a hero.

So why is he part of a study of evil? How can this sympathetic, compassionate, morally consistent character be evil? Is it simply that he is dangerous? No, we are all dangerous, more so than we realize. Magneto is evil because I cannot believe that good and evil are only determined by the the situation that surrounds us. Magneto be a hero when the world has been at war, but that doesn't make him good. Good and evil can't be that shaky, that fluid. Magneto is evil because his convictions, as consistent as they may be, are born from a desire for revenge. His pain cannot make his methods morally acceptable, because methods born from his desire for revenge will never end the cycle that has created Magneto. Revenge, like all other evil is insatiable, it can never be quenched. Magneto can never truly retire or succeed, because no matter how many Nazi's, human bigots or politicians die, he will never be whole. The true danger of Magneto is not his mutant power, no matter how prolific it may be, it is the desire for revenge that cannot be filled.

I want to make Magneto a hero, because I see too much of myself in him. I want to keep my grudges. I want to keep my hatreds. I want to be justified in my anger against people who have crossed me. I want to allow myself to driven to succeed by people who have had the nerve to question whether I can make it. This is abstract I realize, so I will attempt to make it more real. Every time that I feel doubted by anyone, letting go of that has been extremely difficult. Even as I type this blog, I can feel old hurts resurfacing, whether those hurts are from high school, or even about deciding to go on staff with InterVarsity. I feel tempted to derive my strength from proving others wrong. Ironically, these motivations of mine, only serve to prove those doubts to be more founded than I want to believe that they are. I have to choose, that there is a better path to follow, than the one that is defined by people, whether they are right or wrong. I have to believe that call of Jesus is more important than what I am good at or bad at. More important than proving anyone right or wrong. With Jesus I feel like I have hope in being more than I am, which is necessary for me to ever be of any service to anyone.

Without Jesus, I am Magneto.

Lex Luthor

A quick note for people who care about such things, when discussing LL I will be referencing many iterations of the character, including the television show Smallville. If such things matter to you, congratulations, you are the person who has less of a life than I do.

Imagine, you are a writer who is faced with the challenge of constructing a villain for Superman. This cannot be pleasant. So the enemy can't be faster that Supes. Or stronger. Or more indestructible. Essentially, it is off-limits to make this character more super, than the man himself. Fun. So the next step must be to examine the weaknesses that Superman does have, which appears to be one, kryptonite (a rock from Superman's homeworld, Krypton). Unfortunately, making a character that is completely made of kryptonite seems a little impractical and since it would look ridiculous, more than a little unprofitable. At this point your writer brain would probably be a little worn down, you might even be desperate enough to resort to making another Superman, who has his "S" backwards (oops, they did that one). If you are a really smart writer though, with a keen grasp on human nature, you would look at Superman's other "weakness", his morality.

Enter Lex Luthor, Superman's greatest foe.

Lex is not intimidating physically. He is bald. He is pudgy. He has NO powers. Not one. Ziltch. What he is though, is smart. Brilliant actually. He is a strategist, taking each challenge, be it in the boardroom or on the battlefield and treating it like the epic struggles he was raised learning about (Lex is short for Alexander, which Smallville portrays as the name given to him in honor of Alexander the Great). Oh, and his brilliance doesn't end with strategy though, he is also a scientist. The first portrayals of Lex are appropriate for the 1960's when they appeared, he was a mad scientist. Lex is not just some scientist general though, that would be to simple of a foe for Superman, he is a rich scientist general. Oh and he has been the President of the United States of America. And he loathes Superman.

Superman is an alien to earth. It doesn't really matter though, what he really is an idealized picture picture of man. He is big and strong. He has a strong sense of justice and of course he will fight for freedom. He is ethical beyond anyone's doubts. You can always trust Superman, he saves the day. Oh hell, we mine as well acknowledge that there is a clear (though I would argue poor) Christ analogy to him as well. His father sent him off from a different world in the sky. He arrives on earth and is raised by humans. He is fully Kryptonian and fully human. He has the power to move mountains, yet remains as American as apple pie. Everyone loves him.

Except of course Lex.

Lex can't bear Superman, because Superman is everything Lex is not. Superman is idealized humanity, Lex is fallen humanity. Superman is who we pretend to be when we are kids. Lex is who we are afraid we are becoming as adults.

In so many ways, Lex is all right. He went to the right schools. He is successful in THREE fields (science, politics and business). And to look at things with complete objectivity, he has been able to seriously challenge the most powerful man on earth with only his mind and his influence over people. Unfortunately, for all of his talents, relentless work and human power, he has lost his soul to his own pursuit to be the master of all that surrounds him (think I am being dramatic? He literally DID sell his soul in the funny books). His lust for power drives everything that he does and poisons every gift and talent that he has. Lex in Smallville is a perfect example of this, Lex battles his own lust for power every episode, every victory is shallow for the audience, because we know the eventual tragedy that his life will become.

Listing the evil acts of all of the Lex's that have graced comics and film would be too large of a task. The more interesting question, is what is the evil that drives him? The answer I would answer is that Lex worships himself. He wants to be lord over all that surrounds him and ultimately over his own life. But what does a modern day Alexander the Great do in the face of the power of a Superman? He must destroy it. He must destroy anything that assert more authority than he can. This is not just a theme of Lex and Superman though, this is the theme of good and evil that has plagued the world since the beginning. The Bible will tell us that Satan was thrown out of heaven after trying to overthrow God. The Bible will then tell us that Eve will eat the forbidden fruit, so that she can be like God. We will read history stories about world powers fighting over small chunks of land, simply to say that it is theirs. Tomorrow we will drive to work and get mad that someone would dare cut us off in traffic. Sooner than I would like to admit, I will get mad at my wife for an off hand comment, that will make me feel less intelligent than her. Lex is our own reflection. He is the dirty marriage of insecurity and desire for control that lives in all of us.

And he is the only enemy that worked for a Superman.

Evil

How is it possible to talk about evil and to not judge? Intuitively I know that evil exists. I have seen it. Felt it. Experienced it. I also have been utterly taken by it. I have believed that certain things have been evil, only to have a massive change of heart later in life (don't laugh, but Lord of the Rings fits into this category for me). How do I not take on as my job to decide what is evil, but still take a stand when I see it? Should I ignore calling things bad, because I may be wrong? I have seen how good intentions have destroyed people, groups and nations. This only has been magnified when it has been the church that has led these movements against evil. But doesn't it have to be true that some things are simply not right? And that there are times to take a stand?

I love superhero stories. Batman, Superman, Spider-Man, the X-Men, Daredevil, the list goes on and on. The theme that takes me in is good vs evil. Men and women, not willing to sit idly by and watch the innocent be destroyed. I want my life to be lived in a similar manner. I want to stand against evil, not for my own ego (at least I hope that is not my goal), but so that evil will not be able to destroy. I know that when loneliness consumes a person, and they are taken in by the little lies in their head about how worthless they are, that is evil. I know that when someone works 40 hours a week in back-breaking labor and cannot feed their family, that which works against them is evil. And I know that the reasons these examples and millions like them exist, is because the world that we live in is not what it was intended to be. That it has been corrupted by what is evil. And I know that when I am apathetic to that condition, when I simply stop caring, that is evil inside of me.

But how can I ever trust me own fervor? On what level can I believe that even know when or how to fight the evil that I know exists, yet can often be hard to find? To be honest I wish I had a Joker, Magneto or Green Goblin to point at and say "you are evil!". Instead I am given two unsettling realities, 1) that this worlds enemy is not flesh and blood and 2) that if I want to find evil, I have to look no further than myself. I cannot ever separate myself fully from evil, and I can never separate anyone else from the potential to be good. After all, I know from experience that I am capable of so many awful things and I know from faith that even the "worst" person I know is created in the image of a perfect and good God.

So I will examine evil the best way I know how, by studying villains. I am going to write about my favorite "bad guys". Characters like Magneto or Lex Luthor. How are they unsettling like us. And where does it all go wrong?

Church

I want to go to Jesus' church

The one with all of the sinners
The one that meets in the worst people's homes, on mountain tops, in sinking boats and on street corners

I want to go to Jesus' church

The one with the prostitutes during the day
And the pastor's who only dare come at night

I want to go to Jesus' church

The one that has no organ or acoustic guitar
That has no building, stained glass, fancy robes or powerpoint

I want to go to Jesus' church

The one that will make me angry, make me cry, make hope, make me fear, make feel

I want to go to Jesus' church

The one with no lease, or gym, or youth room
The one I have to follow, seek and run to

I want to go to Jesus' church

Coherence

Alright I have written and deleted three posts today. So I will try and make a quick point here; I have more questions than answers right now. I feel like I should only blog about things that I understand or have processed, unfortunately, I am plum out of those things right now. So I will list the questions I have right now. That seems more productive.

How can a life be authentic and disciplined?
Can the Seahawks really win a playoff game?
Is Jesus happy with the state of the American church?
Is liberal a dirty word?
Is conservative?
Do they have any place in the church at all?
Is entertainment bad?
Should I be more weary of the "world"?
Do I need to understand the "world" more?
Am I going to be with InterVarsity in five years?
Does it matter if I know that?
Are the Mariners and the Red Sox ever going to complete the Reed for Clement trade?

What is better to have a lot of questions or answers?

Superman

Last night I dreamt that I was Superman. It was a weird dream, everyone needed my help. People were falling off of things, drowning and constantly yelling for help. It was my job to save them. My duty. Being powerful is an odd thing I guess. Sure its odd to be faster, stronger and less tired than everyone else, but honestly that didn’t feel to odd in my dream. What felt odd was how often people got themselves into trouble. It was constant. I couldn’t get anything else done! It was as if my power made everyone else around me more vulnerable.

Being Superman wasn’t too much fun.

Later in the dream, I met someone else with identical powers. While I was saving someone else, my father (not my real father mind you, Superman’s father), needed saving and I couldn’t make it in time. But my equal could. My equal swooped in and saved my father’s life. Immediately my father and I knew that I had an equal. Someone else knew my plight, he knew the way I lived, he knew me! It was great. Great, until my equal became my enemy. Turns out, he didn’t like saving people all the time. He felt like he was allowed to rule them. So we had to fight. He got away. Something else to worry about.

Being Superman wasn’t too much fun.

Often in dreams reality and fantasy become very blurry. I guess that is why when I was on my way to save some people that were trapped inside a sinking ship I encountered my friend Zac on a bridge. You see, Zac didn’t know I was Superman, he only knew me as Jeremiah. Zac is an old friend. I haven’t seen or spoken to Zac in a long time. Zac have not been doing well for a long time. Zac needs help. He needs a friend. But I wasn’t Jeremiah, I was Superman and their were people dying that only I could help. So I told Zac I couldn’t talk to him then. I jumped off of the bridge, dove into the water and saved the dying people. But I didn’t have time for my friend. I hope he didn’t jump.

Being Superman wasn’t too much fun.